Chapter 788: I’m Sorry

Translator: Nyoi-Bo Studio  Editor: Nyoi-Bo Studio

It was evening when the horse carriage stopped outside the village. An old man stepped out of the horse carriage with a staff in hand. His long leather boots stepped on the muddy ground and the poop of chickens and ducks as the walked into the village.

In front of the door, there were a few children, who were playing with each other in the mud when they saw him and began to move further away from him out of fear. That old man was wearing a thick coat with a top hat on his head. The walking stick in his hands and the boots on his feet all seemed very expensive too. They would never be able to afford to replace them if they dirtied those items.

“Go on home, it’s time to eat.” On a bench in front of the door, a young man, who was also playing around with the children, laughed and gave them some of the wooden toys that he had just made and urged them to leave.

He did not look like a farmer that worked in this village. In fact, very few people from noble families looked as handsome as him. He had a good temper and he was quite good with manual work too. On top of that, he was also a doctor, so he knew how to use herbs to cure high fever. He had only been here for half a month, and everyone in the village was already fond of him. The only pity was that he was blind in one eye. Many ladies in the village would secretly take a peek at him while gossiping with each other about how good-looking he would be if he had both his eyes.

“Long time no see, Mr. Constantine.” He raised his head and looked at the old man with a smile. It was just too bad that he was wearing an ugly-looking eye patch so his smile looked slightly pitiful.

“Charles, long time no see.” Gaius held onto his walking stick as he slowly made his way to Charles’ side. Then, he sat down on the muddy bench. He seemed to be very tired as he breathed out loud.

“I’m here to see you.”

“I have already recovered fully.” Charles laughed and used the apron on his pants to wipe his hand. “Let me get you something to drink.”

“No need, I only came to sit for a while,” said Gaius. “I’ll be leaving in a moment.”

In order to avoid causing a commotion like in the past, Charles had chosen to find a small village near the capital to recover in secret. Other than a few guards and protectors hiding in the dark, no one knew that this gentle and good-looking young man was actually the Son of God. Many of the villagers would use wheat to pay him for helping out in their homes, and he was more than happy to do it.

Although they had not met for a long time, Charles did not feel awkward at all and was still talkative as usual. “This place is pretty good, Mr. Constantine. If you have the time, you should come and stay here once in a while too. The chicks that I am rearing are about to leave their coops. When I first came, they were still so small. At night, when I slept, I would have to keep them in the house and they would be chirping away…”

Gaius nodded. “When they are out of the coop, I will come again. Shall I bring a cook along?”

“That would be best. I’m not a very good cook, so I often have to rely on others.” Charles laughed somewhat awkwardly.

“I’m glad to see that you are doing well. Get well soon. I’m overwhelmed without your help.” Gaius was hugging his hat and walking stick while touching his hair. His mottled hair became somewhat messy. It was hard to disguise his fatigue.

“I’m jealous of you, Charles.” He sighed softly. “In the past, many of these things wouldn’t have been such a big deal to me, but after knowing you, I realized that I have gotten old and am no longer at the age when I’m always full of energy.”

“Give yourself a break once in a while, sir.” Charles laughed. “In the summer, we can do some fishing in this river. I can accompany you.” After looking around for a long time, he only managed to find a bag of dried fish to host his guest. He felt a little awkward.

Gaius took the bag of dried fish and looked it over before forcing himself to stuff one into his mouth. He tried to chew it a couple of times but to no avail, so he decided to swallow it whole. He choked.

“I’ll get some water…”

Five minutes later, Gaius finally recovered himself and laughed bitterly. “It’s too salty.”

“Someone gave it to me. He used too much salt,” Charles explained awkwardly. The man who gave this to him had only good intentions. Nowadays, salt was expensive while dried fish was cheap. Unfortunately, it caused someone to choke.

After hearing that, Gaius looked relieved. “Looks like you have made new friends. Charles, I told you before, everyone will like you.”

“Hmm.” Charles nodded and did not say more.

“What happened?” Gaius asked.

Charles was silent for a moment before muttering softly, “Mr. Hoffman, who was the person that gave me the dried fish, he died a few days ago…”

Gaius nodded and did not say a word.

“He sold his lands so that he could work in a workshop in the city. He gave me the dried fish before he left. But within two days, he was sent back. One of his arms was cut off by a machine in the workshop. It became infected. We couldn’t buy any medicine here, and there was nothing I could do to bring down his fever. He died, just like that.” With that, Charles laughed bitterly. “If only I still had my powers. I could have saved him.”

“Charles, this is not your fault.”

“I know. I’m just sad.” Charles looked at the calluses and scars on his fingertips. “Many of the villagers here are just like Hoffman, including the children. Just now, that child was his little son. In two days, he will also be going to the city to work. He signed a contract that lasts for three years. He will not be able to earn much at the workshop, yet he will have to slog his guts out like a slave. If he didn’t work, he will die of hunger. Over here, despite a bumper harvest, they would not be able to sell their crops unless they lowered the prices. Yet if they wanted to buy more, it would be too expensive… Mr. Constantine, why is this happening?”

Gaius said nothing. Charles did not wait for an answer.

“Haven’t we already won, Sir?” He asked, “The war is over and many people are working hard to survive, but it’s still so difficult. The Sacred City has already been defeated, but so many of these annoying things still persist. Those that couldn’t survive in the past still can’t.”

Charles asked him, “They have already sacrificed so much for this world. Why do they still need to continue sacrificing?”

Gaius did not respond. He only looked into the distance at the chimney smoke rising from a nearby village. He watched the evening sun setting very slowly.

“There are many things, Charles, that are difficult to explain to you. I know some of these things are not ideal, but for the sake of the future, we have no choice. We have to sacrifice a generation in exchange for the prosperity of future generations.” He continued, “Charles, this is a necessary pain.”

“It didn’t have to be this way. If the people of the present aren’t able to survive, then how is it meaningful for future generations to become prosperous?” Charles shook his head. He was confused and furious. He could not accept such a reply. “Mr. Constantine, you once told me that you were going to create a new world, where the homeless would have a place of their own and many people would live happily ever after. Haven’t we already succeeded? We already did what we were supposed to do, but why are things still so cruel?”

Gaius finally turned to look at him. There was a peaceful look on his face. He was old and frail, and there was a look of determination and compassion that Charles was all too familiar with.

“Charles, do you remember what I told you at Sacred City?” He continued, “The pain will pass. All pain will pass. This world is not perfect, Charles. There will always be regrets. There will always be things that we can’t change even if we really want to.”

Finally, he still said the cruelest sentence, “I’m sorry, there is nothing I can do.”

All of a sudden, Charles seemed to be in a trance. It was as if he had just completed a long and difficult journey but could not reach the most important destination, so he could not help but feel tired, sad, and… disappointed.

“It shouldn’t have been this way, Mr. Constantine, it really shouldn’t.” He looked up with his remaining good eye and stared at Gaius. It was as if remnants of the glorious light of the past could still be seen in the good eye. It was like a flame. “This is not the world that I wanted!”

Gaius was stunned.

“If there’s nothing you can do, then let me. Sir, I can do it!” He leaned forward agitatedly and stood in front of Gaius. “I still have one good eye and so much blood. I can give you miracles, Sir, no matter how many you want!”

Gaius did not say a word. He merely looked at him. After a very long time, Charles became less agitated and he hung his head weakly before returning to his seat. The sun had set and dusk came very quietly. The cries of wild beasts could be heard far away.

“It’s too late, Charles. Go and rest. I should get going.” Gaius propped himself up from the bench with his staff. Finally, he put on his hat and bade farewell, “I’m sorry. I did not consider your condition, and I said things that were inappropriate.”

“Hmm.” Charles forced out a smile and got up to send him off. He was taken by surprise when the old man stepped forward and embraced him. He was already so old that he needed a walking stick, yet his embrace was so tight that Charles felt suffocated. It was as if he was saying goodbye to his own son. It was so forceful.

“Er, Sir…” Charles was taken aback and did not know what to do.

“Sorry, Charles.” Gaius’ voice was hoarse. “I’m sorry.”

Charles did not know where to put his hands. He began to feel embarrassed. “No, it’s no problem. No problem. It’s just a small argument… It’s late. Sir, you should hurry back and rest, in case you have another meeting late in the night.” He patted Gaius’ back. “When I am fully recovered, I will go back and help you so that you won’t have to work so hard.”

“Alright, goodbye.” Gaius took a step back and took one last look at Charles. Then, he turned around and left. “Goodbye.”

…

After Gaius returned to the horse carriage, it sped off into the darkness silently. In the carriage, a man, who had been waiting, silently passed over a document. The man looked simple and frail. He did not look like a secretary, nor did he seem capable of taking up such a fast-paced job that demanded quick thinking. Neither did he fit the description of “a man of great wisdom appears slow-witted.” He seemed purely slow-witted.

“This thing was left behind in the carriage,” the man said. “It’s a medical report. I think it should be yours.”

Gaius took over the file and shook it before laughing forcefully. “Have you seen it?”

“No.” The old man shook his head.

Gaius caressed the cover of the file for some time before tossing it to the vacant seat on the side. There was a long silence.

“There is a tumor in my body. Over here.” He pointed at his right brain with his finger. “It is growing with the nerves.” He continued, “It started six years ago. I always thought it could be controlled. I thought I would be able to hang on for a longer time. Just a little longer will do.”

Silence. The old man seemed to be completely stunned. There were no reactions and there were no words of consolation.

“I’m running out of time, Abel.” Gaius hung his head tiredly as he closed his eyes. “I’m dying.”

There was a long silence in the darkness. There was a soft gagging sound. “Abel, please… kill him.”

…

The horse carriage stopped on snowy grounds in front of the palace. Gaius opened the door and proceeded to step off the carriage. His steps were not sturdy, so he stumbled a little. The guard wanted to give him a hand, only to be waved off and pushed away.

White snow landed on his shoulders. He bent down with difficulty and held onto his knees for support. He looked completely exhausted, as if he could no longer bear his own weight.

“I’m sorry.” He wrapped his coat tightly around his body but he was still trembling in the cold. He was muttering to himself, “I’m sorry, Charles, I’m really sorry…”

Just like that, he vanished into the darkness, looking devastated. Outside of the tall walls, Paganini stood silently in the shadows. Snow fell on his face, covering those pair of dark eyes. He turned around to leave without a sound.